For some people, the idea of a big white wedding, where you’re the centre of attention, is unpalatable. Whether it’s this, or maybe it’s just too difficult to escape family politics and decide on your guest list, eloping can hold a certain romantic appeal for those who want to get married without all the fuss.
However, whilst elopement might seem low-stress when compared with throwing a big wedding, it can be hard to know where to start, and the chances are you won’t want to ask anyone for advice if you’re looking to keep it a total secret. Remember, the general aim of eloping is to keep it simple and focused on you and your fiancée, so keep that at the front of your mind when you’re planning. If you feel that this is the right decision for you, then go with your gut.
Check the rules
Firstly, check what you’ll need to make the marriage legal. When you throw a big wedding, the venue can often help with the paperwork side of the event, but when you elope, you’ll need to make sure that you’ve submitted all the necessary forms yourself. Check if you need a marriage license, if you need to give notice (the equivalent of having banns read for a church wedding) and if you’ll need to bring witnesses.
Make a plan
Once you’ve settled the legal requirements, you can focus on creating your perfect day. The joy of eloping is that there is nothing to stop you from doing exactly what you want to, apart from being at the venue on time.
If you’re looking to elope abroad, then get planning the other days of your holiday, so that you can have your dream wedding experience. Let the hotel know your plans, and enquire if they do any special packages to help you celebrate. Just make sure that you insure your engagement ring and your wedding rings, and pack them safely in ring boxes, as they can be a costly item to lose or damage.
You’ll also need to decide if you want a photographer, as you won’t have any family or friends to take photos for you. It can be lovely to have photos of this special moment to look back on, especially when you are going to share photos of the day with those who weren’t there, so make sure you get a photographer that you’re happy with.
Let people know
Once you’re married, it’s time to let your friends and family know! Decide as a couple who you’re going to tell first, and try to make sure that you let them know as soon as possible, and definitely before posting any photos on social media.
If you want to celebrate in style, you could throw a party. Either let your loved ones know that you’re married before the party or keep it as a total surprise and tell them when you’re all together. Just bear in mind that some people may be shocked that you kept it private, so be prepared, but remember that this is a choice for your happiness and that of your partner, and hopefully they’ll be supportive.